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Old 25th February 2009, 01:33 AM   #1 (permalink)
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a poem i wrote

That Girl

You say you don’t understand that girl
But did you ever give her a chance
To show you what that girl is really like
Why would you give her a chance?
She’s just that girl that no one likes
The one you love to hate
But there is more to that girl
That girl is so much more than the one everyone loves to hate
That girl is sweet and caring person
But you will never see that
All you see is that loud hyper girl
That’s all you will ever see
Because that girl has had it with this hated life
That girl doesn’t feel like living anymore
Because of all the pain
That girl knows there’s nothing to loose
Now that girl’s hated life is over
Are you happy with yourself?
You are the one that caused all that girls pain
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Old 13th March 2009, 03:30 PM   #2 (permalink)
Craven is grumpy
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Re: a poem i wrote

Honestly, I don't like it. Too many uses of the word 'girl'. It's a very honest poem though, straight from the heart, which gives you a 6/10.
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